Comme Ci, Comme Ca

Dear Reader, this post has no social relevance whatsoever.
It’s just a ramble so you might not enjoy it. And to those freaks who object to the use of the term ‘fat’ in the entry, I wish to clarify that it is in no way derogatory. Fat is a perfectly normal adjective like tall, thin, old, young…- and I find it very endearing. So there.

Like most babies I was born chubby with a big round head, round arms and round legs. Later my childhood years saw me growing into a scrawny adolescent. I developed a small, lean frame and a rather mismatched loud voice. Weight jokes were an intrinsic part of my friends’ interactions with me at that time. They were usually well intentioned jokes, but I did feel hurt. So between ages 12-15 I began overeating. I loaded on the butter, chocolate and milk- whatever seemed rich, irrational and fattening. That plan had little effect, other than making me sick and thinner still.

Time changes things though. It turns out that my Jughead-like constitution is a farce. I can put on weight and unfortunately it’s starting to show. Let me reiterate at this point, a few things:

- I am a girl.

- I am a teenager.

- I am stupid.

It was war yesterday, with me trying to pull on a pair of jeans. A war that I lost and it woke me up. Those jeans fit perfectly only about a month ago. I think the bulge can be beautiful. Fat people are gorgeous and I love and respect them. But I cannot let myself gain those inches, simply because I don’t feel healthy or athletic. It’s not natural for me. I have gone from wanting to be plump to wanting to be fit now. I don’t want to be called skinny, Barbie (!), anorexic or bulimic but hey, I wouldn’t mind petite or nimble. That would suit me just fine.

Perhaps someday, I will read this and laugh at myself. There are so many more important things that need my attention. For now however, allow me to be vain.

Today I make a resolution. Crunches, sit-ups, push-ups, anything it takes to stay in shape.

EDIT: I felt an update was in the waiting here. I have moved over the i-want-to-be-a-size-0 (ugh) phase now. Back to a happy 28 inch waist. Yoga, lots of water and hours of random dancing helped. I am not skinny, nor overweight. I am healthy. Woohaa.

I figured I haven’t written anything shallow and superficial off late. Consequently I’m writing about my Johnny Depp fixation.

Well, he’s going to marry someone soon, whose name I forget. So first I want to wish Mr. and Mrs. Depp a happy married life! (What? Green…my face is turning gre..? Jealous? Me? No way…Oh c’mon)

I watched Sweeney Todd recently, drooling buckets the whole time. What is one supposed to do when his perfect face fills the screen and that seductive voice surrounds you? I am yet to watch a lot of his other work, and plan to do some marathon movie watching to that effect soon. They always dress him in bizarre costumes and take liberties with his make up, but he comes through carrying off every ridiculous piece of clothing, still looking like the absolute stunner that he is. Enough said about the good looks. I could go on but why continue stating the obvious? As far as cinematic appeal is concerned, there’s few as good as him. A member of the endangered ‘less is more’ school of acting, the man thrills you with each role he plays. Let’s face it, the Pirates movies would be no good without him. There’s something about him that reminds me I’m a woman, a thinking woman. Because he’s definitely the thinking woman’s man. Ah…yeah.

This post was pointless and hopelessly girly. I just want to end by saying- ‘Oooooo like Johnny Depp like todally like uh big time Rocks!’ Ha…